This is a space for fragments and frameworks, systems and soulwork.
A place for recovery and spirituality—whatever those words mean to you.
I’m Bryan. I’ve spent my life seeking—the loud questions and the quiet moments, the patterns beneath the mess, the experience of life, and the meaning in what we carry and what we release.
This is a home for imperfection. A space where mistakes matter, where stories remain unfinished, and where there are no destinations—only journeys.
If you’re here, you’re already part of the search. Let’s explore it together.
Welcome.
Who I am, What I Hold
I’m a musician, strategist, librarian, traveler, creator, and bibliophile—drawn to forgotten stories and unfinished questions. I build systems, restore old books & maps, tell stories, and strive to create beauty out of this messy world.
I have lived as a person in recovery since 2018, and believe we all deserve recovery from the things which take us away from our selves and others.
I want to share my story, hear yours, and to make space where everyone can belong—just as they are.
“If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you. If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you.”
— Gospel of Thomas
Recovery: The Road Back In
Recovery is central to my life—not just from addiction, but from all the ways we get lost: in silence, in shame, in trying to be someone we’re not.
Recovery isn’t about perfection—it’s about connection. With ourselves. With others. It’s about learning to live honestly, to make room for mistakes, and to face life fully—without numbing or running.
I’ve shared my story in treatment centers, classrooms, recovery groups, and with people just beginning their own path—and I’m always open to more conversations.
Whether you’re deep in it, just beginning, or simply curious, you’re welcome here.
“Logic is the beginning of wisdom, not the end of it.”
— Spock
Music & Musings
Music has always been part of how I move through the world—and rebuilding my relationship with creativity has been one of the great gifts of recovery: an act of reconnection, healing, and learning to find my voice.
I release music under two names: Bryan Deziel for the melancholic, angsty, emo/pop punk side of myself—and BGD for the electronic musician inside me, looking for happy music to drive to.
Two sides of my expression. Two voices, same soul.
Writing has always been harder for me than speaking—my mind moves too fast to catch. I’m a perfectionist with ADHD, always overflowing with ideas. That combination makes writing both a challenge and a release.
I write to tell stories, create worlds, and search for meaning in the unanswerable—about recovery, identity, imagination, and the world we live in. Sometimes it’s just rambling thoughts. Sometimes it’s fiction.
Most of what I write is unfinished. Some of it always will be.
This site is a place to share those fragments—snapshots of works in progress, pieces of thought I’ve moved on from, finished or not.
More things I Love, Build, and Do
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Archival Clamshell Boxes
For over a decade, I’ve been restoring old books and building custom clamshell cases. I sell these via Bryan’s Books, Etc., and recently started building custom decorative boxes as well. Contact me for more info or to request a custom quote.
I was originally trained in bookbinding and archival conservation while in grad school and hold a Certificate in Archives and Cultural Heritage as part of my MLIS from Dominican University.
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Professional Life
I’ve worn many hats in my life - music roadie, TV stand-in, librarian, archivist, addiction recovery technician, legal professional, public speaker, entrepreneur, and more.
This website here speaks for me, and me alone.
If you are interested in my professional life, you can connect with me on LinkedIn, or download my resume below.